So, this bird walks into a store

So, this bird walks into a store..... Marinette, WI

A seagull in Marinette, WI has developed the habit of stealing Doritos from a neighborhood convenience store.

The seagull waits until the Manager isn't looking, and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos. Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and shared by other birds.

The seagull's shoplifting started early this month when he first swooped into the store in Marinette, WI, and helped himself to a bag of Doritos. Since then, he's become a regular. He always takes the same type of chips.

The Manager thinks it's great because people are coming to watch the feathered thief make the daily grab and run, and that's good for business, and especially since customers have begun paying for the seagull's stolen bags of Doritos because they think it's so funny.  However, the Manager did say, 'This is Wisconsin, and if that seagull starts to grab a 6-pac to go along with the Doritos, I may have to put a stop to it.'

Perspective

When you have an 'I Hate My Job day' [even if you're retired, you sometimes have those days] try this out:

 

On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson &Johnson. Be very sure you get this brand. When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed.

 

Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your favorite chair. Open the package and remove the thermometer. Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken.

 

Now the fun part begins.

 

Take out the literature from the box and read it carefully. You will notice that in small print there is a statement:

'Every Rectal Thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson

is personally tested and then sanitized. '

 

Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, 'I am so glad I do not work in the thermometer quality control department at Johnson & Johnson.'

 

HAVE A NICE DAY; AND REMEMBER, THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A PAIN IN THE A** THAN YOURS!

Safe or Not?

The 'safest' place may not be the only place where a person doesn't get hurt - it just means that it's safer than anywhere else!

How to clean a toilet

This is simply too much of a time saver not to share it with you:

 

1.   Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2.   Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

3.   In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.

4.   The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5.   Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.

6.   Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7.   Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift the lid.

8.   The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.  

9.   Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.

 

Sincerely,

The Dog

The Culmination...

Ha!

Say What?

"Models are like baseball players. We make a lot of money quickly, but all of a sudden we're 30 years old, we don't have a college education, we're qualified for nothing, and we're used to a very nice lifestyle. The best thing is to marry a movie star."

~ Cindy Crawford, Supermodel

Cute Joke, Told Many Ways

~ Two Little Boys ~

After a hardy rainstorm filled all the potholes in the streets and alleys, a young mother watched her two little boys playing in the puddle through her kitchen window. The older of the two, a five year old lad, grabbed his sibling by the back of his head and shoved his face into the water hole.

 

As the boy recovered and stood laughing and dripping, the mother runs to the yard in a panic.  "Why on earth did you do that to your little brother?!" she asks as she shook the older boy in anger.

 

"We were just playing 'church' mommy," he said. "And I was baptizing him in the name of the Father, the Son and in the hole-he-goes."

Time to Change

prayer. it's more than just ask ask ask for what i think i need or just want. it's a way to have a conversation with my creator. not just in church, or on my knees, but when i hear a new and awesome song or a stranger smiles at me or i get a call from a dear friend who i miss tons or take a walk and the scene around me makes my heart beat wildly with the moment Jesus created just for me to see in that moment, a sun set, sun filtering thru leaves, deer in the field, tiny flowers in gardens. and pictures of them all! in my mind and a few on my camera to remember. and no matter how creative i think i may be, my creativity could never come near to matching the wonderful creativity of my God who puts these things in my path to delight me and bring me closer to him. so, i feel silly, but i am excited to travel on this road that Jesus has planned for me no matter.

time to say 'goodbye' to my old wineskin and trade it in for a new one.

Psalm 62

Yours

by dizmas....


Web source for the latest music: onlylyrics.com
It feels like the sky has never been so blue
But that's not the way it used to be
Because there was a time that I was without you
Before I said that I believe

Ooh I need a savior
Ooh I need a savior

I want to give this up
I want to hold you hand
Take away this fear that's like an ocean in my head
I want to tell you now, What I couldn't say before
You are everything that I was always looking for

So take me where you want me
Take me 'cuase I want to be yours

I've got pride that I still have to break
It's keeping me away from you
And you stay patient while I make mistakes
I'm learning how to trust in you

Ooh always a savior
Ooooh

I want to give this up
I want to hold you hand
Take away this fear that's like an ocean in my head
I want to tell you now, What I couldn't say before
You are everything that I was always looking for

So take me where you want me
Take me 'cuase I want to be yours

In the good and the bad times
Ooooh
It don't really matter
I want to know you

I want to give this up
I want to hold you hand
Take away this fear that's like an ocean in my head
I want to tell you now, What I couldn't say before
You are everything that I was always looking for

I want to give this up
I want to hold you hand
Take away this fear that's like an ocean in my head
I want to tell you now, What I couldn't say before
You are everything that I was always looking for

So take me where you want me
Take me 'cuase I want to be yours

cat conversation to watch when you need a laugh

Sooo funny.  Watch these in order and praise the Lord for cats!!  hehe =)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z3U0udLH974&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IkczguZoI7k

Brand New Day

another one by Fireflight:

I’m waking up
The world is turning
The sun is shining again
I’m holding on
To things I shouldn’t
It’s time to let them go
I’ve been on a losing streak
Hit so hard I couldn’t speak
But when I hear Your voice it fades away

And I can hear You say
It’s a brand new day
The pain goes away
I’m headed for the door
And I’m going home
I’m going home
I’m going home
I’m going home

Your love, it burns
Away my darkness
You guide me when I’m blind
You are the light
That shines inside me
Showing me I’m
So much more
When I’ve been on a losing streak
Hit so hard I couldn’t speak
But when I hear Your voice it fades away

Take me into Your arms
My home lies within Your heart

Unbreakable

by Fireflight

Where are the people that accused me?
The ones who beat me down and bruised me
They hide just out of sight
Can’t face me in the light
They’ll return but I’ll be stronger

God, I want to dream again
Take me where I’ve never been
I want to go there
This time I’m not scared
Now I am unbreakable, it’s unmistakable
No one can touch me
Nothing can stop me

Sometimes it’s hard to just keep going
But faith is moving without knowing
Can I trust what I can’t see
To reach my destiny
I want to take control but I know better

Forget the fear it’s just a crutch
That tries to hold you back
And turn your dreams to dust
All you need to do is just trust

Praise and Adore You

by Wavorly

What I have to say is obvious
A knowledge free, for all of us are
Your Word leaves us with no excuse
The paths we choose make us who we are
There’s a breeze blowing through here tonight

So I praise and adore You
Lay it all down before You
In every way You’re beautiful
From my heart
I praise and adore
You made the world beautiful
I cannot stand and deny
You created life
And some live without it

Wake up morning sunrise in my eyes
At night the moon lights all the sky
(Still some say You didn’t do a thing)
The sound of hope that’s in the air
In everything, it’s everywhere
(Reveals a truth that’s worth remembering)
There’s a breeze blowing through here tonight

It’s true, it’s all You

And every breath I take
There’s no way
Accident created this place

Best of SonShine 2008

Most Entertaining:  TobyMac

Most Anticipated:  Jars of Clay

Favorite New Band:  FireFlight

Favorite Show:  Newsboys

All Time Best:  Newsboys

Show to See Again:  Dizmas

Unexpected Enjoyment:  David Crowder

Funniest:  David Crowder

Fun Quote:  "Everyone smile!" - Zach, Dizmas

Longest Line:  Newsboys autograph line

2nd Longest Line:  waiting for the bathrooms to be cleaned

Best Non-Music Fun:  blog notes with Socrates

Learning New Things:  Socrates taught me Kiss, Hug, Date...

Best Non-Music Entertainment:  The Dark Knight

Favorite Purchase:  Newsboys sweatshirt

Favorite Food Item:  Walk'n'Taco

Most Annoying:  Peder Eide 'Sonshine. Sonshine, listen to me!'

Most Annoying:  sound problems at Main Stage

Loudest Show:  Skillet

Quietest Show:  Skillet

 

SonShine 2008 Recap

Wednesday the 16th

Good times, good times. We arrived Wednesday morning and it was blazing hot. So hot that my completely frozen bottle of water melted in 30 minutes and the sun screen burned when it was sprayed on. So, I drank the water and put the sunscreen in the cooler. Good times!

We had an awesome spot all picked out and set up right behind the HM Stage. Socrates borrowed some duct tape and taped the second tarp up to the building to form a little tent to sit under. But it fell. And we had to move the tent – it was too close to the building (someone else ended up putting their tent there for the weekend, tho).

So...we had to pull up stakes and move! We went across the walkway to behind a big screen tent with 8-month-old triplets crawling around inside. What fun! They were not happy campers. L

It was getting hotter outside so we melted into our chairs and all over the blanket. In the sun. It was not long, however, before we were nicely covered be shade from the screen tent. A nice, cool breeze also started up and with the added coolness we were able to rest for a few hours before Jars of Clay played.

7:30 finally came and we headed over to see Masi and Jars of Clay. Masi opened for Jars with worship music. They were pretty good, but the crowd where we were sitting didn't really care about them playing so there was constant jabber making it hard to really hear Masi, which really annoyed me. The Jars concert was great, the moon was amazing. Then it ended and Marco Polo started. Oh, HELP! A volley ball game also started right outside our tent. The ball even hit our tent a couple times! grrrrr

Ah, Sonshine.

Thursday the 17th

And then the rain, rain, rain came down, down, down. Everything in our tent seemed wet. Most of it was. Even the clothes in our backpacks! The mattress I was sleeping on had large pools of water standing on it later...

The Civic Center opened at 10, so I'm sure most people were in there. The rain continued pouring until 11. Many people were leaving, some were sitting in their cars (as were Socrates and I) and a few were out walking covered in tarps or blankets.

Both Socrates and I were a bit stir crazy sitting in the car. We couldn't see what time it was (car wasn't running) and the only sound we heard was the rain pattering on the roof. The windows were all fogger over so we couldn't see out the windows or the sunroof. Everything is damp and sticky. Icky. Blah. Hopefully the rain will stop soon. Socrates hopes in time for Dizmas and I hope in time for Superchick and Jeremy Camp. We'll see...

Friday the 18th

Oh, the travesty! Good day. What happened? I don't remember anymore...oh, wait!

Today was a good day. I saw Thousand Foot Krutch and almost Hawk Nelson and Barlow Girl, but after waiting for an hour of sound checks in the sun I decided to listen from the shade of our tent. I have some new CDs from the week: Maron, FireFlight, Wavorly, Dizmas, and some Skillet songs. YAY!!

Katie, you were right – I did like the TobyMac show! I would even go to another one with joy! Heather was very entertaining during the concert as well. Socrates saw Project 86 and she says to tell you that it was hoppin'! That it was raucous and pretty. She makes me laugh! Another concert I thoroughly enjoyed, but didn't expect to, was David Crowder. He was a hoot! I still won't get any of his CDs, tho.

Saturday the 19th

So it rains. Again. And it was creepy cold for July. brrrrr. My, how I shivered thru the night! Socrates and I have also both sustained injuries now. But life is good. J

Socrates is telling me how she beat a kid to the front of the crowd for a concert. She is getting all annoyed all over again. And no one is texting her back! We are going to see Dark Knight this afternoon while we wait for Kutless, Skillet and Newsboys. Then we go home J to shower and sleep. hehe. HELP! WE STINK!

One of the first things I do when I get home: WASH MY GLASSES!!!

Socrates sounds like a Veggie Tales character, "That girl had North Dakota pants on!"

I can really tell that Socrates had sugar for breakfast....if she could bounce around like a little rubber ball in the car full of blankets and clothes and food she would, and that isn't really stopping her! Except...it's her mouth that's bouncing very hilariously...and she's reading over my shoulder and has that funny voice again.

Andrew.....text Socrates back! She wants to shoot to injure you!

I have 4gb of fun pictures and movies which I will upload when I have time...the pictures are done, but I'm still trying to figure out iMovie on my laptop. It ain't so easy!

I must go bring Someone under control before she yells even louder at the 'small child' for smoking...

ANDY!

Must. Wash. Hair. It has been subject to the sweat of millions of people. EWWWW!

Sunday the 20th (in the morning, this all happened last night)

The Dark Knight was amazing! So funny! Not really Janet rated right now, but maybe once I buy the DVD parts can be fast forwarded. So good. Good like Hot Fuzz. J

Oh, sweet bliss! I got a sweet Newsboys t-shirt and so got to meet Jeff, Duncan and Paul! Peter apparently was not yet at Sonshine....Many other people also got one of the particular t-shirts that allowed us to meet the guys, so we stood in line for an hour together. J

Then we got to settle in for Newsboys!!!!!!!! Unfortunately, the wind was against us so we didn't get any of the confetti, but I did get a couple good pictures!

Scare in the Night

well, i now know what the fire alarm sounds like here in the building.......it woke me up! it took me about 15 minutes to realize that it was an alarm inside the building, not outside somewhere. and then i started scrambling to catch gita (deb's cat) and get to the car to safety...gita was scared, i was scared, and i couldn't get ahold of deb to see how to transport her cat! (she is in MI for the weekend) the alarm turned out to be false, so now i can unwind my guts, quit chasing gita and maybe go back to sleep.

what a night. i hate storms.

how sad

At my apartment, I have wireless internet. It is not very reliable – it keeps going out! There are many other wireless accounts in the building, and the one open one is more reliable than mine! So, I’m often using that one instead of the one I have. Sheesh!

oh, exasperations!

The more plans are made to do anything these days the more they change and move about and cancel!! It gets a bit frustrating at times..........I guess maybe I’m learning to be flexible? And to not plan so much and so far in advance!!!