Ha!

LOL

Happy Birthday, Jack!

Dying

All the good people are dying. People I have fond thoughts of from my childhood. There was Dan Cloniger. He was cool! We had fun emailing jokes back and forth. I really miss that. And then Mike...and now Ralphie.

I don't think I ever really had a conversation with Ralphie, but I loved hearing his stories! He had the most amazing stories to tell. Like when his kids were young, he'd pray that he'd win all the games they'd play - and he did! At least until his kids figures out was going on and retaliated by praying they he wouldn't win. :-D
Or his old car that wouldn't start and wouldn't start...but they prayed and laid hands on the car and it started and I believe it lasted for a long time after that...
And then, when he and a bunch of guys were going to Canada to help somebody build or repair something and he had trouble at the border. (Ralph is Serbian?) That story was always fun to hear.
There has always been some funny and/or amazing story connected to Ralph that made everyone laugh. He was truly a joyful person.
But, he has been in pain for a long time due to cancer. Now that pain is gone. Ralphie will live on in the memories of his family and friends. He was a great guy.

Before and After

SuperSam to the Rescue!

Truth...

...is stranger than fiction.

Wet Pants

Come with me to a third grade classroom...There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet. He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. It's never happened before, and he knows that when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls find out, they'll never speak to him again as long as he lives.

The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays this prayer, "Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I'm dead meat."

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered.

As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap.

The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, "Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!"

Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else - Susie.

She tries to help, but they tell her to get out.

"You've done enough, you klutz!"

Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and whispers, "You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

Susie whispers back, "I wet my pants once too."

Funnies

Ha

February Calendar

Some Things

I got tires today. WHEW! And I had White Castle again. Nummy! I needa car wash...I mean, my car needs a car wash!


It's Dean Jones' birthday today. He's one of my all-time favorite actors. Him and Dick van Dyke.


Here is a funny comic:
Mom's kitchen project is almost officially done! The last of the floor was installed today. Now there is just a bit of trimming left to finish and some new cupboards to make (where the computer desk used to be). CELEBRATION TIME!!!

Coming Clean

Sloppy Joes make for Bath Night...

Bath Night makes for happy babies...
and clean people....
after which playing ensues....

Holding My Breath

I need new tires.

Yikes.

Since the car accident I've known I needd them, but who has the money?? Well...last week I was able to save up enuf to get some! But...I know nothing of tires, so had to wait for Dad to help me out.

Finally, tonight I said that my car was driving funny and could dad please see if it's cuz of the tires. So, we decided we'd fill the car up with gas and check the tires out...but! After asking several times, by the time we got to the gas station the gas had gone from $1.82 to $2.09. So I skip the gas.

And Dad tells me 'You have a bulge on a tire. Who knows when it'll blow...sometime this week probably.' Gee, thanks! I've been asking from help for a week for getting new tires! So, after spending an hour on the web figuring out what tires to get (from Dad's experiences and stranger's reviews) we settled on a some tires to get. Woo Hoo!

But the sad part is, I can't get the tires til SATURDAY cuz where I'm getting them from is booked til then.

Until Saturday, January 27 at 10 am, I will be holding my breath, trying really hard to not freak out anymore than I already am and pray that the bulge doesn't burst....

ACK.





(PS - I won't literally be holding my breath til Saturday, I'd die...but I will be on pins and needles when I drive and won't be doing any extra driving!)


That is my story for the night. I must sleep!

Medical Test

STARE INTO THE CAT'S EYES

FOR 10 SECONDS.....







now stare at the puppies...




NOW SCROLL DOWN

THANK YOU.....

YOUR CAT SCAN and Lab Tests

are now COMPLETE

Old Bread

Happy Birthday

Scary Corn

Rustle the Leaf

Trees

These trees were grown in Santa Cruz, CA, the year unknown, but the man that grew them never told anyone how he did it. Around 1999 the owner of Nob Hill foods in Gilroy, CA, moved them to his park in Gilroy, and they are doing well.

THINGS YOU NEVER SAY TO A COP

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas )
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
5. Are You Andy or Barney?
6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
8. I pay your salary!
9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
12. When the Officer says "Gee your eyes look red, have you been drinking?"
You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

Put Your Shirt On

bluer

Movie: